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March 15, 2012

I have a million things that I could talk about today.

I could talk about the tears I shed when someone I consider to be a dear friend, though we’ve never met in person, messaged me on Twitter to let me know that she was expecting. She wanted to tell me, personally, before announcing it because of the struggle that we’ve had getting pregnant again. I cried not necessarily because I was upset that she was pregnant and I’m not, but because that simple gesture showed me that she cared and that she was thinking of me. And I’m an, without a doubt, over the moon excited for her and her family.

I could talk about the news that we’re possibly taking a mini-vacation in May. Just a short plane ride away to Anchorage for 10 days, but a trip that I am without a doubt beyond eager to take. A trip that will result in a new laptop for yours truly seeing as how I’m booked through May and can’t take 10 days off of work anymore than I can pack up a 21″ iMac to take with me for such a short trip. Rumors are looming about the new 15″ MacBook Air. My fingers are crossed it’s released in April as expected.

I could talk about my husband. And how awesome he is. And how he sat down with me today and asked if I would tell him how I like to answer my emails so he could help me with some correspondence in the afternoons. Emails seem to take up more of my time than actual designing does. Part of the delays I encounter with designs come as a result of not being able to get away from email (most of which is relatively urgent in manner) long enough to spend entire days just designing. So he offered to help; at least for now until we get back from Alabama this summer. After which I’m seriously considering hiring a Virtual Assistant.

I could talk about a quote on Facebook that had me musing for hours…

Good things come to those who wait.   Good things come to those who work their asses off and never give up.

I love this quote. I think that laziness is too dominant in our society. People want everything for nothing and don’t know how to work anymore. What happened to Blue Collar men and women who busted their butts to get what they want? I think that this quote also stands out so much because of the mentality I’ve heard and seen going around in different areas of business (with blogging, with design, with photography, with…well, anything actually) that people owe their success to other people. As in, Little Tina owes her 4.0 GPA to the teacher who graded her paper and taught her class. Wrong. Little Tina’s teacher might have offered encouragement and a few nudges in the right direction, but Tina earned HER grade by busting HER butt. Not because the teacher helped her. Your success is YOUR success because you earned it. Not because someone handed it to you.

I could talk about how being a military family definitely has its downfalls. Like saying goodbye to friends. Which we will be doing a lot of in a few short weeks. Some of our closest friends are transferring this summer. And I’m not too sure how I feel about it. “Happy” is definitely not the term to describe it.

I could talk about this really exciting new project that I have in the works, but probably won’t finish until early May. I had originally hoped to launch it this month. But, life happens. Things get in the way. A big part of it is done. But, there’s still more to do. That mini-vacation in May should provide some good opportunities for me to get some writing and work done to get it ready to go.

I could talk about our one year anniversary coming up. One year since we started trying for baby number two. One year of negative tests. One year of disappointment over and over and over again. We think we might have a handle on what is causing the issue. But we don’t know yet. I have an appointment in April to get the ball rolling and figuring out what our next steps are. I’m not sure how I feel about it. But I do know that part of me has already thought about every situation and outcome at least once.

There are a million things that I could talk about…

But instead, I’ll just sit back, take a deep breath and just keep trucking forward. Stacking one aspect of life on top of the other and building my way toward figuring out and embracing the things that are changing, moving and happening right now.

Just building.

Like he does.

Thanks so all of you who are continuing to link up to 52 Faces every week! Next week will be Week 12, so along with next weeks regular image, I’ll be posting a short recap of the images I’ve captured so far this year. Would love for you guys to share yours as well!

  1. Sandy says:

    oh, he’s adorable – beautiful photos and such an insightful post!

  2. Tessa Linden says:

    Beautifully written! Love the accompanying images too.

  3. Alison Crane says:

    (((hugs))) I love the theme of this post and your beautiful images.

  4. Darien Gee says:

    Courtney, you are doing WONDERFULLY with everything — I have so much admiration for you! Sending you lots of good energy and aloha. Let me know, too (or have your hubby email or post on basecamp), what you need me to do to help streamline everything once you’re ready to start work on the project — I’ll make it my priority to have EVERYTHING lined up if you just tell me what!


  5. Mandi says:

    You know I understand about the pregnancy thing. It really doesn’t get easier… I deal with it better now I guess… but it still hurts. People at our stage of life are having babies… in fact most of my friends are having their second, third and even fourth babies. I hardly even test anymore unless I have good reason to believe I should… I tested last Saturday and of course it was a BFN, I guess my hormones are going wonky again. And as long as we are in St. Kitts I can’t do anything about it. I am glad you will be going to the doctor. Hopefully you will get some answers and get pregnant soon.
    Enjoy your mini vacay in May. Take a lots of pictures so I can experience cool weather vicariously through you! 🙂

  6. Kimberly says:

    It sounds like you have a lot of things lined up for your future. Sometimes all we can do is to keep building. Hang in there, friend. You’ll make it through. ((hugs))

  7. Laura A says:

    You certainly have people who love you! The photos accompanying the post are beautiful.

  8. Andrea says:

    Very insightful post. I hope that this year brings you all you’re hoping for – and WORKING for!

  9. Charlotte says:

    Wow, your photographs are just stunning. I’m sorry to hear about your problems trying to conceive. I hope your visit to the Dr’s office in April brings you some more answers. I’m so glad to hear you have found someone so incredibly supportive and understanding.

  10. Nessa says:

    Sounds like there is a lot of things coming down the way for you. I love that – building things one block at a time.

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Courtney Kirkland is a Sacramento, California photography and design business. Since 2008, Courtney has passionately provided beautiful, meaningful documentary-style photography and intentional, high-quality design.  Value and celebrate the beautiful, messy, and uniquely-special moments of everyday living.