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Being a Mom isn’t Enough

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  1. Laura says:

    Everyone needs their “me time” and their own thing in life outside of being a mom. A happy balance is what it’s all about!

  2. Tiffany says:

    I know what you mean. After having my first child, I went back to work when she was 8 weeks old. At the time, we couldn’t financially afford for me to stay home. After my second was born I wanted to stay home but again it wasn’t financially feasible. When my second turned 2.5, finances changed and I was able to stop working FT and work two half days a week. I have LOVED being home with both kids, but when my oldest was in school it was tough. I had moments where I needed ME time. And I enjoyed nap time too! This year both will be in school, my second is going to preschool 3 hours a day. I will enjoy the alone time and will relish the moment I pick him up everyday. It makes me a better mom. It doesn’t make us bad moms it makes us better moms.

    • Courtney K. says:

      I think you’re right! Being able to be alone and unwind a bit every day is vital to maintaining a healthy mentality. 🙂

  3. Kir says:

    I completely agree and this is why, or the past two days I worked from home (I think I truly considered when I was pregnant) with my kids home (they have strep thoat but were not “Sick” or acting like it) and I hated every moment of it, I couldn’t write, I couldn’t blog, I ws tyring to work and then realized that If it was like this every day, I would resent them so much. I would hate the fact that as I was was a mom….and all of us would suffer beause of that.

    This was fantastic and exactly the way I feel about my status as a mom…that a little time apart is good for all of us. xo

    • Courtney K. says:

      I couldn’t agree more! On those “bad” days when my son is whiny and clingy, I find myself growing frustrated…and then I realize that that’s what life would be like EVERY day if I didn’t take some time to myself.

  4. Mandi says:

    I love being a mom and I realize that my job as Maddy’s mom is the most important job I will ever have. Most of my world does revolve around her at this age but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy nap times (glorious glorious nap times!) and never want to do anything else! Now that I am working from home I realize even more how important it is to be a mom first BUT those 10 hours don’t make me a bad mom. Nobody should make you feel guilty for wanting to be a mom AND do something else. And sure, I watched Maddy sleep a few times but I’ve never met a mother NOT like nap time! I wouldn’t believe them anyway!

    • Courtney K. says:

      LOL I think she was exaggerating a bit and trying to make herself feel better for enjoying the quiet. And you’re right…being a mom is the MOST important thing. But maintaining my sanity? That’s VITAL. LOL

  5. Melissa says:

    I was drawn to your post because of the title. It was the exact opposite of my PYHO post this week.

    Guess what? I agreed with everything you said here. I was shaking my head in agreement. I breathed deeper knowing that it’s okay to look forward to the minutes I do get for myself. I looked into the future where my world is bigger than nap times, sippy cups, and the color of poo.

    Then I realized it didn’t change how I felt about what I had written. I still felt being a mommy is enough–for me–for now. I think there’s is just as much pressure in this world to be something more than a mommy as there is to love being only a mommy when the truth is, both are valid choices/preferences. Who is to say what should be most important at any given time to any of us? Preferences change like the seasons.

    Thank you for reminding me it’s about balance!

    • Courtney K. says:

      It is absolutely okay to look forward to moments of solitude and quiet! You are still a fantastic mother and probably a BETTER mother for getting some alone time! And you’re right. Preferences do change! There are some days where I NEED to be doing something other than being mommy….and then others that I could care less about everything and just want to spend time with my son.

  6. Shell says:

    Oh, I love some kid-free time. 🙂 I need it. I’m a better mommy after I have it.

    I went a little too far in the past few months of trying to be something more than just mom, though. And have had to make changes so that my family is back in the center of my world. It’s all a balance.

    Got you linked up! 🙂

    • Courtney K. says:

      I am too. I need my “me” time or I start to become mean mommy, and I don’t like that. But, I also don’t like getting overwhelmed by work and household duties and forget to enjoy my son. It’s all about balance. Thank you for getting me linked up!

  7. Jessica says:

    I love me some nap times and I REALLY love my baby’s new EARLY bedtime! THere is absolutely nothing wrong with that, nothing. I had never wanted to be a stay-at-home Mom UNTIL I was pregnant and then that’s all I wanted and luckily I was able to do it and I LOVE it but I think I discovered that I enjoy being my own boss and having the time to explore other business ventures just as much as I like being at home. It’s OK to want things for yourself, everybody does (and if they say they don’t, they’re lying or just haven’t gotten to that place yet). It has taken me a while to finally get to the point where I need a break once in a while from the baby and the first time I actually got that break (a few weeks ago) I felt so guilty that I was enjoying it but it’s gotten easier and I get it now, we need time to ourselves…we are our own person!

    • Jessica says:

      edit: adding my twitter ID, I just joined today since you convinced me on your post a few days ago 🙂

    • Courtney K. says:

      I love being my own boss and I love that being a SAHM gave me the means and the opportunity to find a career that I really love. I had to get over my mommy guilt as well when it came to enjoying a little freedom. But it’s made me a better mom in the long run.

  8. Ashley Sisk says:

    I’m not a parent yet…and as much as I can’t wait to be a parent, I also want to still be me. I don’t think you should feel guilty for being that way – that’s a reality.

  9. Stacey says:

    I think the reasons your comment was looked at with such horror is that those moms are
    1. In denial that they feel the same way or
    2. Haven’t yet learned that their world dosent and shouldn’t revolve around their children
    I loved nap times too, love that my girls are older and don’t need my help 24/7; oh they still need me just not as much. I have never been the type of mom who wrapped my whole self around my children; I didn’t loose who I was just because I had a child, I only added the title Mom to my name but I was still me, that never changed and so many moms out their need to realize this and not be made to feel guilty for being themselves !!!

    • Sorry about the deleted FB comment. I meant to reply here! Here’s what I said:

      I was relieved when I got to go back to work after having my Noah. Seriously. Sure, there are women who love everything about being a mom and find fulfillment in revolving their lives around their kids. But that is more akin to loving a job or loving a role, not loving their kid any more than you or I love ours. There’s nothing wrong with either way, it’s just about finding what works for you and your family and makes everyone the happiest. You always hear that a happy mama makes for a happy baby, and it’s true!

      • Courtney K. says:

        No worries! And I think you hit the nail on the head. I think the moms who don’t get away find fulfillment and justification in being a parent full time. I love being home with Noah, but I just CAN’T do it all the time. I have to have some sort of creative outlet or I would go insane!

    • Courtney K. says:

      I agree completely, Stacey! We were all individuals before we became parents. It’s so important to not forget that. And I think you are 100% correct about these moms being in denial!

  10. Kristi says:

    I totally agree! Nap time keeps me sane.

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Courtney Kirkland is a Southeast Alabama Writer & Designer. Since 2008, Courtney has passionately provided beautiful, intentional design to small businesses & bloggers and encouraged thousands to walk in a rich faith in any situation.