OMG, I love this post….absolutely, wholeheartedly LOVE this post! I always thought there was something wrong with me because even though I love being a mom and I struggled to achieve that goal, I never really felt 100% fulfilled. There’s still so much I want to do and parenthood was just one of those things. Doesn’t mean I don’t love my kids or dislike being a mom…it’s just that I recognize that there are so many facets of who I am and what makes me…well, me.
Thankfully, since becoming a mom, I’ve managed to find a nice, little group of friends who feel the same way I do. Nothing worse than feeling judged for expressing your true emotions.
I commend you for sharing your honest thoughts here…it’s not easy to do. But it sure looks like there are many of us who completely understand and can relate to every word you’ve written here!
You’re right, Helene…there is nothing worse for a new mom than to feel like she is “wrong” or a bad parent because she doesn’t feel totally and completely fulfilled being a mother. There is NOTHING wrong with wanting to maintain some sort of individuality after having a baby. Like you said, becoming a parent was just one of the MANY things I wanted to do with my life. 🙂
Great post! There are a lot of SAHM’s were I live, I always get funny looks when I tell them I work and that I have my OWN hobbies. I can tell you I’m a better mom for working and my kids are still alive cause I work (lol)! There was a time when I only worked part-time and ran home everyday to get the kids off the bus, it was rough. Now a days my husband stays home with the kids as his MS keeps him from working and it’s such a blessing (and has been an eye opener for him) to have him doing all the running around, which seems like more since the kids are older.
I agree. I don’t think that we mom’s (or dads for that matter) should have to become hermits and spend all day every day catering to our children and not exploring our own hobbies and desires. I commend you for taking time to yourself and pursuing something OTHER than dirty diapers and playdates. 🙂
I totally agree with this, and also admit that I ALWAYS have looked forward to naptime! It’s my quiet time, my break, my time to get things done. Of course I love my baby and I always am happy to play with him when his nap is over, but during that naptime? That is so MY time! 🙂 I have met people the total opposite as well, and I just don’t understand it. People need date nights and time away, why is that a bad thing? I guess we moms who understand this just need to stick together! Great post girl!
Thank you, Kathryn! I agree with everything you just said. Nap times are when I get things done and unwind. That’s my little window of solitude. I look forward to spending time with my son, but some days, I just need that break!
I am really glad you put this out here I feel the same way 6.5 days a week! love you!
Aww, I know how you feel girl!! 🙂 Love you, dearly as well! How have you been feeling?!
As hard as it is for me to get away from my kids for any amount of time, I need it. I need it to be a better mom and I need it to be a better wife. It lets me calm down, relax, and enjoy just being me. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that!
So do I. If I don’t take some time to myself on occasion, I find myself getting frustrated and grumpy more frequently. And no one wants a grumpy mommy!
You are so normal!
Right now I work full time out of necessity. As much as I’d love to not have to work, a part of me can’t imagine not working. I know I’m not cut out to be home all day with my child. For the longest time I felt guilty that I was missing some sort of mom gene, but then I realized we all mother in different ways. I know that my time away makes me time at home that much better.
You’re right! Everyone has their own ideas on motherhood and I don’t think either opinion or mentality makes you a better or worse mother than anyone else. I admit that the idea of starting over with an infant scares the crap out of me.